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Monday, January 24, 2011

Running From Something Still Most Popular Reason To Exercise

 It's a new year and that can only mean one thing: many of you have set out to tackle lofty personal goals that you'll end up breaking by February 1st.  For most, that means spending your holiday bonuses on expensive running shoes, aerodynamic crotchless pants, and elastic shirts.  But does that mean self improvement is around the corner?  A new bit of research suggests "No.  It isn't."  In fact, the very sport of running/jogging is nothing more than an exercise in futility, if that.

Companies like Nike, Adidas, and New Balance offer a variety of high-tech garments and shoes to make you feel like you're really going to make a change.  Some even offer iDevice friendly applications that allow you to monitor your progress (or conversely watch your old self slip away) as you work.  But none of them give you a real motivation to get out there and break a sweat.  That's why running is such an odd phenomenon in our modern world today: there's no points, no clear cut winner, and nothing making you do it.  Which is probably why so many of you losers fail.

But rest easy, pear-shaped readers!  A new bit of research from The British Academy of Why We Do Stuff contends that it's not your fault!  It's actually your subconscious thoughts combined with the environment you live in that's the culprit.  The Berkshire, England based firm tested over 1000 subjects in 60 different countries, and the results all but speak for themselves. 

"Course, that'd be a little odd too, now wouldn't it?" scientist Sam Peesly said with a mouth full of cockney*.  "Results speaking for themselves.  They wouldn't need us scientists then.  Well, maybe one to press play, but that's it."

"As it turns out, people prefer to run 'from' things," he continued.  "Lions, explosions, clowns, Bobbies^...the point is this: humans reach their greatest speeds, and thus their greatest fat burning potential, when an external catalyst triggers a reaction from them."

So if you're stuck this winter with no motivation to exercise, try having a rapist chase you with a gun.  Let a really mean and rabid dog loose and tie a steak to your butt.  Or visit the lovely Middle East.  But don't kid yourself into thinking "this is the year I make a change," cause you've got absolutely nothing to do with it. 

Happy 2011 from all of us here at Great Scott!

^Bobbies are cops.  Aren't British people weird?

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