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Monday, August 27, 2007

fictitious album review



When I first heard the album by R-p-y-n-n-a N-e-backwards cursive r-a-r-e-backwards capital r, I wasn't quite sure what to think. Was it real? Does music like this actually exist? The truth is, I have no way of knowing. I found a picture of this album cover, and just had to roast it, seeing as it looks like a photo that a fashion photographer dumped in the 'no-good' pile after wrapping a shoot for JC Penny's portrait studio.

She seems like she'd be cute enough. But what's up with her hair? And that background...it's as cold as the soviet winter that she just walked in from. Mind you, I can't imagine that Russians need to add a lot of flare to their album covers to sell music. After all, this is the first time in ages that music has even been allowed there, much less music at pictures, or (gasp) motion pictures!

This only makes me think of my favorite brand of comedy from the Simpsons, in an episode where Krusty was forced to use a different cat and mouse team, as Itchy and Scratchy went to the Gabbo show. The following hilarity ensued:



Call me a one note hack for citing a Simpsons example for everything in life, but I tend to feel like Martin Tupper's character in Dream On...always pulling memories from tv shows and films from his youth to hold parallel to events in his real life. But that's me. I just don't see the non sequitors in black and white.

Anyway, if anyone out there has heard this record by the Russian Sarah Chalke, please let me know. I would love to hear it, as it seems like it might be the funniest thing since sliced bread.

What? Don't think sliced bread is funny? Try having a conversation with it, then we'll talk. This is Scott Towler signing off...

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